Veggie Vamps and other Cullen Song Fics
by Ignorance-Only-Destroys-Us
Summary: Basically random little skits about the Cullens, usually involving them singing Veggie Tales songs with word alterations or other songs. Just random and funny I think so anyway
1. The Vampires Who Don't Do Anything

Yo. Okay, so I few months ago (like 7 actually...but it doesn't seem like long) a bunch of Twilight fans on the Twilight Lexicon Skit Thread started doing a bunch of song fics with veggie tales and other songs. But anyway, we did lots of "veggie vamps" songs and stuff. Anyway, it's basically short little skits involving the Cullens and other vampires singing songs (mostly form veggie tales) I decided to post some of the skits I wrote. They aren't really in character and stuff so don't get mad at me for that. It's just me fooling around, kay? Just for fun.

Anywho, I thought they were pretty funny, so I'll start with just posting one of my little songs and if you guys like it I'll add more. (I have a bunch on my computer and trust me I'll probably write more, they're pretty fun to write)

Moving on...

Disclaimer - I do not own Twilight or any of the characters, they belong to the lovely and ingenious Stephenie Meyer. I don't own Veggie Tales either. But I'm not sure who does. But that person does, whoever they are. Not me. Kay?

**To the tune of _The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything._ And trust me, it's waaaay better if you can listen to the song while you read this...**

**Voice with British accent - **And now it's time for Silly Songs with Emmett, the part of the show when Emmett comes out and sings a silly song. Joining Emmet is the rest of his family who together make up the infamous coven of veggie vamps 'The Vampires Who Don't Do Anything'

**ALL** - We are the vampires who don't do anything. We just stay home and lie around and if you ask us to do anything, we'll just tell you - We don't do ANYTHING!!

**Carlisle** - Well I've never killed a human and I've never drank their blo-od. And I've never terrorised townfolk all ni-ight long. And I've never succumbed to my instincts. No I've never even thought about it. And I try not to be a monster at all!

**ALL -** We are the vampires who dont do anything we just stay home and lie around. And if you ask us to do anything, we'll just tell you - We dont do ANYTHING!!

**Alice** - And I've never ran at superspeed. At least not in front of a human. And I avoid walking around in that bright mid-day sun. And I've never transformed into a bat. And garlic doesn't scare me. And I try not to be a monster at all.

**ALL** - We are the vampires who don't do anything we just sit at home and lie around. And if you ask us to do anything, we'll just tell you - We dont do ANYTHING!!

**Emmett -** Well I've never plucked a rooster and I'm not too good at pingpong and I've never thrown my mashed potatoes up against the wall. And I've never kissed a chipmunk and I've never gotten headlice and I've never been to Boston in the fall!

**Rosalie** - What are you talking about? What does a rooster and mashed potatoes have to do with being a vampire?

**Alice -** Hey that's right You're supposed to sing about vampire - y things!

**Edward -** And who's ever kissed a chimpmunk? That's just nonsense!

**Carlisle -** Why even bring it up?

**Edward -** Am I right? What do you think!?

**Rosalie -** I think you look like Dracula!

**Edward -** Huh? No I dont!

**Rosalie -** Do too!

**Edward -** Do not!

**Jasper -** I think I'm getting thirsty!

**Esme -** Then go hunting!

**Jasper -** No! says who?

**Edward -** Says me!

**Jasper -** Fine then, Dracula!

**Rosalie -** hehehe

**Edward** - HEY!!

**Emmett -** Well I've never licked a spark plug and I've never sniffed a stink bug and I've never painted daisies on a big red rubber ball. And I've never bathed in yogurt and I don't look good in leggings!

**Carlisle -** He just doesn't get it!

**All -** AND WE TRY NOT TO BE MONSTERS AT ALL!!

**Bella - **claps YAY!!


	2. The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Hey people, I hope you liked the first chapter. This one is pretty short too (like even shorter than the last one) but I'll probably post another one even later today. I do have a few finished, it's just editing them and stuff. Once I post all of the ones I have finished I'll start writing some of the ones that have been requested.

Well, this one isn't a Veggie Tales song it's another song that I'm sure you've heard before. Yup. THE LION SLEEPS TONIGHT!

**Disclaimer - I do not own any of the characters from Twilight, they belong to Stephenie Meyer. I don't own The Lion Sleeps Tonight either. sniff I OWN NOTHING. Well...I own a copy of Twilight, which is enough for me! Yay! claps**

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Emmett - In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the vampire sleeps tonight! In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the vampire sleeps tonight...Oh WEEEE-E-E-E A WEE UM BUM BA WAY!

Edward - But Emmett, technically vampires DONT sleep. Remember? We aren't capable of sleep.

Emmett - FINE THEN! sings In the village, the peaceful village, the vampire HUNTS tonight...there happy Edward? now the vampires hunting instead of sleeping...

Edward - So now he's hunting in a village? Whats that supposed to mean? The vampire is hunting people? We're vegetarian vampires remeber! Or is the vampire hunting their pets? ... the poor unsuspecting goldfish!

Emmett -God, Edward it was just a song! sings Awimbuwa awimbuwa awimbuwa awimbuwa Ya dee dee dee dee Ya dee dee dee dee aweeumbumbawae!

* * *

I know. I know. It's REALLY short. But it's not really even a fanfiction. It's just a skit. Another one should be up really soon!

COMMENT! COMMENT! COMMENT! Please, I would love you sooo much if you could just take like thrity seconds of your time and press the little blue button and type and little message. Thank you.

LTC


	3. Wannabe

Heeey!

Yup, here' another one! It's a little bit longer than the last one, but it's still short. They all are short. Please don't be too angry with me about that.

**Disclaimer - I still don't own Twilight or any of the characters. I'm just borrowing them...ehem...Take them and run? Me? NEVER! ehem But yes..they belong to Stephenie Meyer, and well...I don't own any of the Spice Girls songs either.**

* * *

HMM...what if Emmett convinced Jasper to sing Spice Girls with him...

Emmett – Yo! I tell you what I want what I really really want

Jasper - Oh tell me what you want what you really really want

Emmett - I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna I really really really really wanna zigazig AAAAH!

Both – IF YOU WANT MA FUTCHA! FORGET MA PAST! IF YOU WANNA GET WITH ME, BETTA MAKE IT FAST! NOW DON'T GO WASTIN MA PRECIOUS TIME GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER WE COULD BE JUST FINE!

Emmett – So! I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want.

Jasper – Oh! Tell me what you want what you really really want.

Emmett – I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I really really really really wanna….

Edward walks in sees Jasper and Emmett and screams.

Edward - ALICE!! ALICE COME QUICK!! Get the clorox! Come help me wash out my brain!!

Emmett - Hey Eddie it's not THAT bad...come on...join the party!

Jasper brushes himself off - Ehem...Edward it's not what it looks like...you see...ehem...points at Emmett uh...HE made me!

Emmett - Jasper I do believe YOU picked THAT song

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Hope you like that. These are so fun to write, or even edit. I haven't written any new ones yet, I'm still just editing old ones, but I'm getting all inspired. I still have one or two old ones to put up, and then the next few will probably be ones you guys have requested.

Comment pleeeeeeeease! I love love love love love hearing from you. It just makes my day!

LTC


	4. His Grizzly Bear

Okay, so I broke down and wrote a new one. But honestly, it was fate. One of my (few) reviewers asked me too do this song, and then I was listening to my itunes library on random and sure enough "His Cheesburger" was like the third song or something. So..I got inspired.

This one is pretty rough though, I only did one draft and I don't have a beta so it isn't perfect, bear with me kay? I just wanted to get it up as fast as possible. And all I really needed was to have Emmett singing, but I added Edward in just...because.

Please review guys! I have gotten a pathetic amount of reviews, I'd really really appreciate it!

**Disclaimer - I dnot own tiwghlit tguoh I srue wsih I did it sitll bonlegs to Stihenepe Myeer and Vgegie Tlaes bleogns to...smoenoe**

Can you read that?? I just wanted to try it out.

* * *

To the tune of the veggie tales song "His Cheeseburger", trust me it works better if you can listen to the song while you read this.

**Emmett -** british accent And now it's time for love songs with Emmett, the part of the show when Emmett comes out and sings ... a love song.

**Edward –** A love song?

**Emmett –** Just go with it Jazz... sings He said to her" I'd like a large grizzly, and I might like a cougar as well." She said to him "I can't give you either." And he said "Isn't this Veggie Vamp Take-Out?" She said "Yes it is, but we're closed now. But we open tomorrow at 10!" He said "I am extremely thirsty, but I guess I could wait until then!"

**Edward – **Where is this going?

**Emmett **- sings Cause your his grizzly bear! His yummy grizzly bear! He'll wait for you-oo. Yeah! He'll wait for you-oo. Oh! You are his grizzly bear, his taste grizzly bear! He'll wait for you-oo! Yes, he will wait for yoooooo!

His stayed at the drive through till sunrise, he could not sleep 'cause he's a vamp. He spotted a billboard for _Dracula's, _rabbit and deer for half price. How he resist such an offer. He really needed some blood to drink! Grizzly bear please do not get angry he'll even be back here for lunch!

**Edward –** shakes head

**Emmett -** sings CAUSE YOUR HIS GRIZZLY BEAR! HIS PRECIOUS GRIZZLY BEAR! He'll be back for you-oo, yeah! He'll be back for you-oo! Won't be so long grizzly bear! Oh lovely grizzly bear! He'll be back for you-oo! Oh he'll be back for yoooo!

Cause he loves you grizzly bear with all his heart, and there ain't nothin' gonna tear you two-o apart. And if the world suddenly ran out of bears, he would get down on his hands and knees, to see if someone accidently spilt some bear blood on the ground he would slurp it up for you, slurp it up for you. He'd drink that dirty blood just for you!

YOU ARE HIS GRIZZ-LYYY BEARRRR!

**Edward **– Oh God Emmett.

* * *

TADAAA! I'm not sure how great that was, I mean, I didn't spend all that much time on it, I was just fooling around. But still tell me if you liked it, loved it, hated it, if it made you cry, if it made you laugh, if it was funny, if it was stupid. JUST COMMENT!

COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT

Thank you,

LTC


	5. I Love My Teeth

Okay, once again relatively short. Sorry it took longer than I expected to get this up. I meant to have it up the day before yesterday I think, but I never got around to it. I mean, I still had to edit this one, but I didn't really feel like it, so I started working on my next one, which I believe shall be a masterpeice. schemy fingers But, I'm away tomorrow and I doubt I'll have that one finished today (being such a masterpeice and all...) so it'll be a few days. Sorry.

Anyway...

**Disclaimer - Still don't own any of it. **

* * *

To the tune of _I love my lips _from veggie tales, and it still works better if you can listen to the song while you read this. (if you do...I didn't do the whole song by the way...)

**Voice with British accent **- And now it's time for silly songs with Emmett. The part of the show when Emmett comes out and sings a silly song. One day while talking to Dr. Carlisle Emmett confronts his deepest fear.

**Emmett -** If my teeth ever left my mouth, packed their bag and headed south that'd be too bad. I'd be so sad.

**Carlisle **– I see, that'd be too bad, you'd be so sad…

**Emmett **– That'd be too bad.

**Carlisle –** Alrighty

**Emmett -** If my teeth said adios I don't like you I think you're gros, that'd be too bad. I might get mad.

**Carlisle **– Hmm…That'd be too bad. You might get mad.

**Emmett –** That'd be too bad.

**Carlisle **– Fascinating…

**Emmett **– If my teeth moved to Duluth left a mess and took my lip, that'd be too bad. I'd call my dad.

**Carlisle –** Hold it! You mean ME? FASCINATING! Soo what you're saying is if your teeth left you…

**Emmett –** That'd be too bad, I'd be so sad, I might get mad, I'd call my dad. That'd be too bad.

**Carlilse –** That'd be too bad?

**Emmett –** That'd be too bad.

**Carlisle –** Why?

**Emmett **– Because I love my teeth!!be do bop bee dee dee dee bop dee . . .

**Edward –** inturupts mini therapy session Emmett, if you didn't have teeth you wouldn't be able to drink blood and you'd starve. End of story.

**Emmett -** So I can still sing!!

**Voice with British accent -** tune in next time to hear more silly songs with Emmett. the part of the show when Emmett comes out and sings...a silly song!

**Edward -** Emmett...

* * *

You know, I was just thinking. Lots of the reviews I get are from people who really like these, and if you don't I apologize. It is hardly a real fanfic and I'm not surprised if the website admin people get mad at me and take it down.

No one is really in character much I'm just fooling around, don't take this too seriously. It's just for a laugh, kay?

LTC

ps - REVIEW ANYWAY! please...I really love getting reviews and I love my reviewers!


	6. Endangered Love

Well...here we are!

This one is a little bit longer, but still short. To the tune of _Endangered Love_ or _Barabara Manatee _from Veggie tales. You really have to be understanding about this one. Just pretend that Riley was born towards the end of Twilight, as opposed to in Eclipse, kay? And so he loves Victoria, but she's still with James so we have a little love triangle kay? And throughout the song Victoria and James are talking to each other and just ignoring Riley. Got it? Okay...

**Disclaimer - **

**Me - -disguised as Stephenie Meyer- I am Stephenie Meyer! -ehem- I own twilight! MUAHAHA! **

**-real stephenie meyer enters- **

**Stephenie - EXCUSE ME!?**

**Me - erm...yeah**

**Stephenie - No! I wrote the book! It's mine**

**Me - No you see...I am stephenie meyer -points to self in disguise-**

**Stephenie - You wanna go to court about this!**

**Me - well...no. -sheds disguise- fine...**

**Stephenie - that's better! Now any other confessions?**

**Me - -sigh- Well...I don't own veggie tales either I guess. -sigh-**

Oh, one last thing...it works better if you can listen to the song while you read this. :)

* * *

**Voice with British accent –** And now it's time for silly songs with Riley, the part of the show when Riley comes out and sings a silly song.

We join Riley as he becomes involved in the love triangles and general messed-upness of this vampire coven's little world.

**Riley –** Darling Victoria, you are the one for me! Sent from up above, you are the one I love!

**James –** Please Darling Victoria, you're good at escaping, you've come in quite handy, but I must go out into the world and kill that silly human girl called Bella...and you can't come because you just can't track. Buhbye!

**Victoria –** But if you leave James, who will take me to the Ball? Who's going to take me to the ball James? I have a new dress and shoes, and contacts to cover my red eyes. Who will take me to the ball?

**Riley –** I'LL TAKE YOU TO THE BALL VICTORIA!

**Victoria –** Please don't go!

**James –** I must!

**Victoria –** Don't go!

**James –** I must!

**Victoria –** Don't!

**James –** Must!

**Victoria –** Don't! Don't!

**James –** Must! Must!

**Riley –** Darling Victoria, you are the one for me! Sent from up above, you are the one I love! Darling Victoria, I'll be your new vampy mate! I'll take you to the Ball! I hope you're not too tall!

**Victoria –** JAMES! I've learned to track!

**James –** You have?

**Victoria **– Oh, yes...I have indeed!

**James –**Oh yes Victoria! I always knew you could, I really hoped you would. Now can we go out and kill that silly human girl called Bella?

**Victoria –** Yes! But first James, Will you take me to the Ball? Oh James, will you take me to the Ball!?

**James -** . . . I can't dance. . .

**Victoria –** You can't?

**James –** No

**Victoria –** I must go!

**James –** Please don't go!

**Victoria –** I must!

**James –** Don't go!

**Victoria –** I must!

**James –** Don't!

**Victoria –** Must!

**James –** Don't! Don't!

**Victoria –** Must! Must!

**Voice with British accent –** This has been silly songs with Riley, tune in next time to hear James say...

**James –** VICTORIA! I've learned to dance!

**Victoria –** Oh James!

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Haha well there we have it! Thats my masterpiece! I have to say it was pretty fun (and kinda hard) to write!

I'd really appreciate if you would review! Thanks!


	7. Emmett is Stronger

Yes. I know. I suck. I never update. I suck. I'm sorry!

I've been busy, I tried to warn you. I didn't even have time to actually write a new one, I just was digging through some old papers and stuff and found this one and was nice enough to think of all you guys and take the time and effort (okay...like 10 minutes shhh!) and type this up and post it. Love me. Hate me. I'm posting.

Anywho...

Let's just say that for one night, sometime during Eclipse, Edward let's Emmett babysit Bella for a night while he's out hunting. Bella is afraid and, of course, in Edward withdrawl, so Emmett tries to comfort her with a song. It's not TOTALLY unlikely right? Ha. To the tune of none other than **_God is Bigger. _**Which was always one of my favorite Veggie tales songs, probably because it was on my first Veggie Tales Episode _Where's God When I'm Scared. _Moving on...

**Disclaimer - I. Don't. Own. Twilight. (Or Veggie Tales for That Matter)**

But let's get down to business. . .

(Oh and one last thing. . .as always, it works better if you listen to the song while you read this :D)

* * *

**Emmett –** -sings-You were lying in your bed, You were feeling kind of sleepy, but you couldn't close your eyes because the room was getting creepy. . .

Was that James in the closet?

Was that Victoria in the hall?

Was that Jane or maybe Aro casting shadows on the wall?

Now your heart is beating like a drum, your skin is getting clammy, there's a hundred sadistic vampires coming here to drink your blo-od!

-speaks- What are you gonna do?

**Bella **– I'm going to call Edward.

**Emmett **– No! You don't need to DO anything.

**Bella **– What? Why?

**Emmett** – Because. . . –sings- Emmett is stronger than that Ja-a-ames! He's cleverer than Victoria and he wants to pick a fight! Oh, Emmett is stronger than that Ja-a-ames and he's watchin' out for you Bella!

[**Note - **livingstorywriter101 wrote this next part, all of the credit goes to her and all that jazz...except for the whole Twilight-thing and the whole Veggietales-thing of course!)

**Alice **- So are you frightened?

**Bella** - No, not really.

**Rosalie** - Are you worried?

**Bella** - Not a bit! I know whatever's gonna happen, that Emmett can handle it!

**Edward** - Wait! What about me!?

**Bella** - Uh...

**Emmett** - Emmett's stronger than that Ja-a-ames! He's cleverer than Victoria and he wants to pick a fight! Oh, Emmett is stronger than that Ja-a-ames and he's watchin' out for you Bella!

**Edward** - That's it... (Walks out)

**Everyone** - Emmett's stronger than that Ja-a-ames! He's cleverer than Victoria and he wants to pick a fight! Oh, Emmett is stronger than that Ja-a-ames and he's watchin' out for you Bella!

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And I'm ending there...It's...just better that way. Okay?

But I was going to mention that many of you have been suggesting songs that I should do, and I really appreciate that. (Keep it up...I love it! :D) But some of them I don't necessarily feel comfortable doing as of yet. You see, the whole veggievamps thing started on the Skits Thread on the Twilight Lexicon, and some other peoples did songs like the Veggie Tales Theme, and the Waterbuffalo song. And of course, they ended up deleting most of that thread. :( So anyway, I do believe a couple people on the Lex were saving our skits but I don't want to do some of those songs without permission from the people who originally did them, whether I change them completely or not. You see? I'm a good person. I don't like plagerism and I don't copy other people's work. :D

Thanks for the recommendations though! Please keep it up, I just can't do some of them for the time being.

I love reviews too! :D -cough- Hint. Hint -cough-

Love you all lots!!

-LTC

**p.s.** - thank you livingstorywriter101 for your continuation of the song!!!!


	8. Princess of Pain Jane's Lament

I was listening to Jack's Lament (the All-American Rejects version even though the original is better) And started wondering if Jane could feel remorse? (or course she can't it's only a 'what if') And half an hour later Jane as "Princess of Pain" was singing her lament to the tune of Jack's from The Nightmare Before Christmas on paper. And then a few days later (today) I typed it up and uploaded it. So here it is!

* * *

**Jane** – There are few who deny it

At what I do –I am the best

For my talents are renowned far and wide

When it comes to surprises in the moonlit night

I excel without ever even trying

With the slightest little effort of my ghost-like charms

I have seen grown men give out a shriek

With just a thought from my head, like a well-placed blow-

I have swept the very bravest off their feet!

Yet year after year it's the same routine

And i grow so weary of the sound of screams

And I JANE- Princess of Pain

Have grown so tired of the same old thing *sigh*

Oh somewhere deep inside of these bones

An emptiness began to grow

There's something out there far from my home

A longing that I've never known

I'm a master of fright

And a demon of night

And I'll make you writhe on the ground like a worm

I live here in Volterra

And I guard the Volturi

And I'm known throughout England and France

And since I am young

I can feign innocence

To lure them to a false sense of security

No animal, nor man

Can induce pain like I can

With the use of only mental methods

But who here would ever understand

That the Princess of Pain with the sinister grin

Were tired of her crown

If they only understood

She'd give it all up if she only could

Oh there's an empty place in my bones

That calls out for

Something unknown

The fame and praise come year after year

Does nothing for these empty tears

* * *

Hahaha! Just kidding. We all know Jane is evil through and through. That's why we love her!

You all know the holidays are coming up (very quickly might I add) and the Cullen's will have to celebrate too! And you know what that means? CHRISTMAS-RELATED PARODIES SUNG BY THE CULLEN FAMILY! And other vampires possibly. :P My metaphorical creative juices are flowing. We'll see what I come up with.

Please review. And tell me what carols and such you would like to see!

Creatively yours,

-LTC


	9. God Rest Ye Merry Veggie Vamps

Well, Christmas with the Cullen family, like Christmas anywhere else, can get a little chaotic, and we all know how much those Cullens like to sing! Up first, a song from Emmett – God Rest Ye Merry Veggie Vamps, obviously to the tune of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen. As always, it works a hell of a lot better if you can listen to the song while you read this, here's a version of it on youtube.com/watch?v=kAesbViYYqM&feature=related That's the one I used while writing it, so it'll probably work the best.

Disclaimer – I don't own Twilight, or this Christmas carol, I don't know who wrote the latter, but Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and it's characters. I actually didn't totally come up with the veggie vamps thing alone. 'Started LAST Christmas on the Skits Thread on the Twilight Lexicon and I think a girl that goes by the screen name bananas_for_edward actually started the veggie vamps thing, although everyone else kind of fed off that. Good times. But I'll stop being all annoying and nostalgic and let you read the fanfic/songfic already. :P But for the record -- I don't really own any of it.

* * *

**Emmett - *sings***

God rest us merry veggie vamps

Let nothing dismay

Remember Carlisle's theory

He says we still have souls

Just because we are all vampires

Means not that we should prey

On delicious human blood

Human Blood

On delicious human blood

Edward still believes that

Our souls are all gone

And that we are all doomed

To the fires of hell

If this is true I really hope

That I shall never die

That I shall never die

Never die

That I shall never die

"Fear not though" said Carlisle

"Ed knows not of what he speaks

We still will go to heaven

If we are virtuous

So no lying or killing

Or premarital sex!

Or premarital sex

Premarital sex

Or premarital sex

* * *

Haha. I amuse myself sometimes. I've come up with a few other Christmas-related stuff that could potentially be veggie vamped, but we'll see what I actually get done. I haven't done much already, and I do have family coming to visit and relatives and all that jazz. 'S Christmas you know. (seriously. It's like -40 degrees celsius here....well...-30 plus windchill. But either way it's cold)

But Merry Christmas everyone. Review please. I'll love you for it. It can be my Christmas present, kay? Just click the review button and type a few words or lines of whatever, it'll make my day - I love hearing from you.

Creatively Yours,

-LTC


	10. The Bunny Song

Sorry I haven't updated in AGES. But by now you should be used to very long intervals between updates. I know. I'm sorry. I always am.

Buuuut. I do have a short skit/song fic for you. *insert clapping here*

To the tune of "The New and Improved Bunny Song" from Veggie tales, which has the same tune as "The Bunny Song" haha and as always it works better if you could listen to the song while you read this. Look it up on youtube maybe.

Disclaimer - Once upon a time there was a girl who wrote fanfictions and rarely updated and she was sad because she didn't own Twilight - it belonged to the Queen Stephenie Meyer- and she didn't own Veggie Tales - they belonged to the Veggie Tales people...whomever they may be. The End.

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**Emmett **– *sings* The bunny The bunny  
Woah I ate the bunny  
I didn't eat my soup or my bread,just the bunny  
The bunny  
The bunny  
Oh, I love the bunny  
But now I feel sick in the head from the bunny  
I didn't eat my salad  
I didn't eat my steak  
I had too much candy and got a tummy-ache  
I need to eat good food to help me to grow  
I'll obey my momma cause she loves me so  
Yah I'll go to church  
and I'll go to school  
That stuff is important  
and I ain't no fool!

**Alice **– EMMETT! What did you say about a bunny?

**Emmett **– umm....did it sound like this *sings* The bunny, the bunny...

**Alice **– YES

**Emmett-** Oh, I said that I ate it.

**Alice **– YOU ATE A BUNNY!

**Emmett **– Erm..yeah. Vampire. Remember?

**Alice **– A LITTLE BROWN BUNNY!

**Emmett **– Yus.

**Alice **– EMMETT I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!

**Emmett **– I'M ALREADY DEAD! I'M A VAMPIRE...and why do you care so much about what I eat anyway?

**Alice –** That bunny was for Bella!

**Emmett –** Alice, Bella doesn't eat bunnies, she's a human.

**Alice –** Not for her to eat, you idiot. For a pet.

**Emmett –** OoOoh.

**Alice -** *glares*

* * *

I'll leave it up to you guys to imagine what happens next. Haha.

Love you all. (especially when you review -hint hint- -waggles eyebrows-)

Creatively yours,

LTC


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